Kannur - The heart was made to be broken

Where should you go when you have a broken heart? It’s not a topic that most of us want to think about, much less experience firsthand, but unless you’re living happily ever after with your first love, most of us have or will experience heartbreak at some point in life. When it happens to you personally, it’s devastating and while people can relate, they aren’t in that moment. The pain is there and it’s real for you. Sometimes it feels like you’re completely helpless and you’ll never get past the suffering.

Traveling can be a wonderful way to come back to yourself again. Spending time on your own, seeing beautiful things and reminding yourself how resilient you are can be wonderfully healing. Best of all, you can make all the choices without having to consider anyone else – one of the joys of being single!

Hitting the road, to create distance where I can refocus again. My mom wasn’t interested me traveling so far in a bike as solo. I told I need to make this trip to bring back the real me and she agreed. Packing all my luggage, it was around at 8:00 am, I started my ride. My first point of break was Mysore for the lunch, where I was stuck not knowing the route where I need to go. Riding along the road, I entered through lush greens and coffee plantations of Coorg.

Sipping a hot tea, in the middle of road shop, more adventure was yet to come. I had to ride through a reserve forest, where no buses or people were seen. This was my first drive through the Brahmagiri Wildlife Sanctuary. Every second, every inch riding through the no-man’s land was adventurous and thrilling. Reaching the border of Karnataka and Kerala, I had to cross the Koottupuzha Bridge to make my first step into Kerala – The God’s Own country. Riding along the roads of villages and towns in Kerala, i am at the end of road with the waves crawling gently to the shore at Arabian Sea.

I wonder if I would ever notice water, had I been born in the oceans with fins for limbs. I suppose then it would have been my air and I would have moved within it more easily than a animal in the jungle. As it is, I love dive within those salty formless arms and feel the freedom it gives, transparent and blue, soft and strong.

After gazing at the sea for few hours, i had been to nearby Tellicherry Fort. The fort over looking at the sea, raises to height of 10m and it is oblong on pian. It was built out of laterite blocks with high round holed walls and string flanking basetions. A light  house marks the site of an old redoubt. With time to close the fort, i left to the nearby hotel for a stay at night. The hotel had served  the town's famous food - Thalassery Biriyani for the dinner.

From the carousel of random ideas comes some order - a subtle awareness of who I am under the flow of thoughts with their loose connections to my waking life. If they are still in my head there is no bread crumb trail back to them. My eyelids flicker open to the unlit room and  It’s just me and the sun, which I get to watch slowly peek above the trees for its A.M. debut. Roaming across the fish markets around the sea, i got to sea a variety of fishes around. Watching the calm and cool sea in the morning, I had to attend my colleague marriage near Kuthuparamba and got ready for that.

Standing amidst the crowd, i saw my friend - the Bride. She called me near and introduced me to her brother. I never imagined i would make it this far for my friend's  marriage. She was in shock. It was a moment of pride and happiness, attending a Kerala Style marriage for first time and saw my colleagues who came by train. The tying of Thaali, the Kanyadanam. It begins with a ceremonial welcome for the groom and his family, followed by the blushing bride's beatific entry. The girl’s father gives the bride to the groom, the giving away of clothes and, finally the drinking of sweet milk marks the various rituals of a typical Kerala Hindu wedding. I was just seeing through the rituals, never staring my eyes away. Conveying my wishes and giving the gift, I left for Sadhya (Kerala Wedding Meal) which consists of 25 dishes served on a banana leaf.

Sadhya - Kerala Wedding Meal

A smile on the face and heart soaked with extreme happiness, i left the marriage hall and started driving towards the St Angelo Fort in Kannur. This massive triangular laterite structure is flanked by gigantic bastions that make for an imposing sight. It changed hands between the Dutch and eventually the British, who would remodel and reequip it into their primary military stronghold in Malabar. Striking a conversation with the people around there, they wanted me to photograph them. Then later, there camera wasn't good, so  i used my mobile camera and shared the pictures. Its good to be, when you are loaded with happiness and sadness equally, finding a way out in the midst of the sea.

Have you ever been to allowed to ride a bike on the beach, its happens only in Kerala. Muzhappilangad Beach is famous for being Kerala's only drive-in beach. At about 7km from Thalassery in Kannur, you have a 4 km stretch of sand that awaits you to simply drive along as you soak in the view of the beautiful Malabar Coast. 

Riding along the coast and unsatisfied, kept riding along the waters and fell from my bike. Just took my bike and riding like a mad racer. No words for the moment, feeling overwhelmed in the thrill and joy of the ride in the waters. Time was around 4:00 P.M, i left the beach to see the sunset at Thalaserry Kadalpalam. Setting of the sun shows how a end of the journey can be so beautiful . Sunset makes me feel better and fills me up with positivity . When I watch sunset it feels like everything paused for a moment and colors are flying in the sky just to paint the world.

Leaving tomorrow back to home, I had uplifting moments and, of course, supremely sad moments. But eventually, I could breathe again. I tried things I had never tried before, and I ultimately did things that scared the sh*t out of me. So, little by little, I was able to make new memories, learn how to be alone and even revel in it. I pieced together the mystery of who I was at my core, and who I wanted to be in the future. Maybe traveling solo didn't necessarily heal me or my heart. But, it was a grand start. It was a grand restart.

"Traveling Won't Heal Your Heartbreak, But It Will Teach You To Love Again"